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| First Love "How do you tell your kids, not to do, what you did." |
Monday 19th Feb 2007 |
| If you have read any of my stuff you
know that I started dating my "current " wife when she
was thirteen.
We got married when she was 17, one week after she graduated
High
School. We have been married for almost 30 years. I
bring
this up because my son is fourteen years old and he thinks he is in
love. I can only assume that he is, since I have never thought
I
was in love when I wasn't. My son is a kid so I
find it
hard to believe that this is "the girl," but then he can always shut me
up by asking, "How old was mom when you started dating?" I
don't
think his girlfriend's Dad likes him too much, but then again my
father-in-law once put his shotgun in the front seat of his car and drove around
looking for me. I'm pretty sure fathers don't have to approve of you, for
it to work out. I talk to a lot of Dads now that my son and daughter are getting older. I have to say most dad's don't like the kids that their kids want to date. That's not the case with me because Matthew was about two smart comments away from going to a military school before he started dating Megan. My only concern is that she will break up with him, because Military schools are really expensive. It seems that the kids that us fathers really hate are boyfriends. I'm lucky since Katie is five years younger than Matthew so she hasn't started to date yet. The other advantage of having a boy first is if someone messes with my beautiful, innocent, daughter and I beat the heck out out of him, I'll end up going to Jail. If her older brother defends her honor he will get a brand new car. Most of my friends don't seem to care if they go to jail or not when it comes to their daughters. I have had two great stories told to me by Dad's  about their daughters. The first one was told to me by a
friend of mine
who lives in Kentucky. He told me that he keeps a box of bullets
by the front
door. He makes boy that wants to go out with is daughter
come
in and pass an interview. If he fails the interview, the father
picks up the
box
of bullets loads his 9mm Beretta and shows the young man the front
door. I think the message is very clear. That isn't
as
funny as what happens if the boy passes the interview. He
brings
his daughter down tells the boy the rules of the date, such as what
time to have her home. They leave together and just as the
boy
hits the last step, my friend calls to him and tosses him a bullet from
the
box. The dad then says. "Great catch." Now son, you
understand that if you mess with my daughter the next bullet will
be coming
at you a lot faster than that one did." The other story was from one of my friends in Missouri. I am going steal and modify one of the questions he asked each of the boys that wants to date his daughters. I don't want to be sacrilegious but I am going to ask anyone that wanted to date Katie, "Son, have you accepted Jesus Christ as your personal savior?" I won't wait for his answer because if he has or hasn't my response will be the same. I'm going to tell him, "Because if you mess with my daughter. He is the only one that will be able to save you." My son can not wait for Katie to start dating, one because he figures sooner or later he his going to get a new car. If she dates enough losers he might be able to get a motorcycle and plasma TV as well. He also wants to see if I treat Katie's boyfriend like his girlfriend's father treats him. I don't think I will, since a lot of partners don't let their kids date until they are at least sixteen years old. It is very hard for me to do it again because of the, "How old was Mom when you guys started dating?" The other reason I don't think I'll do it is it doesn't seem to work. Matthew has gone to a lot of movies, Starbucks, and restaurants with girls that he was "not" dating. My wife would have loved it if when we dated we did stuff like that, heck I think she would be happy if I took her to those places now. The other non-date seems to be going for long walks at 10:30 at night and walking to 7/11. I don't know when 7/11 became a date place. I still can't figure why a parent that says they are not going to let their daughter date until she is sixteen would let her daughter go for a walk with my son. I know this is sexist but Katie is not going for walks at 10:30 at night. Matthew is upset because Megan's parents limit the amount of time they can spend together. He asked me if I was going to do that with Katie and I told him, "Nope, I'm going to try and make them spend more time together so they break up as soon as possible. Luckily Katie doesn't read my stuff so she won't know about this plan. I figure if I invite the kid to spend as much time with Katie as he can that she can cycle through the losers as fast as possible. What the boy may not like about this plan is I will always be there with them. He will be sitting at my dinner table every night so I can keep an eye on him. Movies will be a family affair. Starbucks is out because I don't like coffee. Long walks at 10:30? That will happen only if they are walking over to ice skate in hell. Movies seem to be the big date activity now. They go out to movies a lot. They also watch a lot of movies at each others house because of DVD's, Cable, and Pay for View. I ask Matthew what movies he watches and I'm surprised when he tells me. They don't seem like date movies. I was going to explain to him that you have to watch "Chick Flicks" since I assume he was making her watch movies like "The lord of the rings." because he is a geeky kid. I stayed out of it long enough to understand what he picks movies based on length. Megan's Dad kicks Matthew out after the movie is over so they look for the longest running time they can find. Cheryl and I are in complete agreement on just about everything mostly because she tells me what to think on just about everything. The only thing we have not agreed on is the Internet, especially MySpace. She is terrified by MySpace and while I am concerned about it enough to have my own account so I can look over and comment on anything that my kids post I am not overly concerned about MySpace. The spaces that really scare the heck out of me are real world spaces like the backseat of a car, secluded woods, railroad tracks. I remember being young and back when we were going out it wasn't to Starbucks. We were going for long walks in the woods. The shotgun story started with me not going to the movie with Cheryl but being parked behind the movie theater with her. If Cheryl had an older brother he definitely would have gotten a new car out of that lapse of judgment on my part. Even those places, while they are scary, don't scare me as much as my number one fear. I have lost more sleep and woke up whimpering like a little girl more often lately because of sign I saw on the side of I-35 "Motel, rooms $49.95 " My gosh, that is cheaper than most of the video games my son buys and he buys a new video game at least every couple of weeks. I just hope that Megan's bother doesn't end up with a new car. |
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